The passing of a bodhisattva

With heavy heart and sorrow, I write these words about the passing of a close friend. He passed away a few days ago from a head trauma as a passenger of a boda in Uganda. His was an untimely and senseless death caused by a hit and run on a Friday night in Kampala. But I won't dwell upon his passing as it is his life that I want to celebrate and the inspirations and memories of joy that he brings to all the lives he had touched in his short time in this world.

Sujal Parikh is a bodhisattva in the truest sense of the word. Let me explain what I mean by this. In the world view of buddhism, the goal is to alleviate suffering through the understanding of the world for what it truly is and to live in the moment. Enlightenment is achieved when a person has achieved this understanding and lives in the moment. A bodhisattva is a person that seeks to achieve this enlightenment and pushes beyond and ease the suffering of others through making the world better or teaching. While I know that Suj has associated himself with the philosophies of buddhism, I cannot say or even know if he has achieved enlightenment. But from all the things he has done and the impact he has on others, he truly strives to do what every bodhisattva in the legends do: ease the suffering of the world. And I feel and believe that he pushes the boundaries of what it means to ease suffering in the conventional meaning. I say this because he does not simply want to ease suffering for each individual that he is near through compassion, care, or direct help. He actually wants to enact changes in the world that would end the pain and suffering that disease brings to people in Uganda, in Africa, and beyond; changes that rely on intelligence, political will, networks, modern day technology, ideas, medicine, evidence, and every arsenal at our disposal in today's world. I see Suj as a truly modern day super bodhisattva that pushes beyond what the legends say.

From all the words that I read in the past week about the lives he had touched, I cannot help but recognize that I had actually lived with a bodhisattva for two years and not had recognized it. Ultimately, it wasn't just the written words, but the emotional outpouring and pictures and memories that came rushing back while together with the close-knitted group of friends. It was not just this passion about human rights and global health and AIDS in Uganda and Subsaharan Africa and working with children with AIDS and his love for all sentient life. It was also his over the top drive for life, his partying, his taste for good whiskeys and martinis, as well as his humor and dorkiness amongst friends as well as his uncanny ability to play video games, too. It is with deep pain and tears that I acknowledge this great loss.

I mourn my own loss of a close friend, our mutual friends' loss of a joy and inspiration in our lives, our school's loss of a great student and scholar, and the world's loss of a real bodhisattva. The loss is especially difficult given how much more he would have accomplished, how many networks he would have established, how much political will he would have mustered, how many lives he would have improved, how much joy he would have brought, and how much suffering he would have eased.

It is all of the outpouring of thoughts about him being a great friend and awesome person, starting vigorous and incredibly well-thought-out debates when drunk, inspiring all that he has met, and bringing all the joy and happiness into all of our lives. All the remembrance and all the reminiscence. All of that passion and compassion. I cannot help but know that the bright light in the night had been extinguished.

But yet, tonight, I am comforted by a particular thought that he shared with me on one of the many walks home from a night of studying in downtown. It was this very idea that we all have told him that he would be the one that would create so much change in this world, he would do all of these great things that we ourselves could not do, and he would be the one that can make this world a better place. But he denies that this would be the case, he knows that everyone means well when they say these things, but it's not going to be him alone. He had expected us all to step up and do our parts and not leave it up to him to be the one that fixes it because we all need to fix this world and become the solution to ease and end suffering. It wasn't just going to be his work, because it was really going to be everyone's work. Suj did have this quality of being humble and inspirational.

Another thought on another night, I asked him about figuring out my own passion and doing the work that I would want to be good at and maybe I could do some good while I'm at it. He said to me what he had said to many others that have asked him before, he really told me to just try and venture out on a limb and that I wouldn't know until I have given it a shot. It didn't really matter that it wasn't going to be global health or AIDS policy or even health policy. It just mattered that I pushed the limits and boundaries of what can be done and what has been done. It mattered that I tried and gained a focus and became good at something that might benefit the world. It mattered that I become better so I could make a real difference. It just mattered.

Those thoughts resonated more tonight than ever before. We are to be the ones that will do the work that has been started. It is to this memory of this brilliant mind, compassionate soul, and amazing friend that we must continue our work as the ones that ease the pain and suffering of the world.

Tax increases...

Ah crap, I guess I should pay attention to the receipt and the % on the sales tax part nowadays. Effective April 1st, 2009 (like an April Fool's joke or something), 1% sales tax increase? -.- To think that I came back to fun and sunshine, I guess I shouldn't be out spending money with the stupid increase in sales tax. Darn consumption tax. Just raise the taxes on the rich people, don't hurt the people that have low income!

So yah, photoshoot...

Here's one of the pictures, my friend's processing the rest of 'em at her leisure. She's not gettin' paid for these anyway. =oX

Update: Gmail came back

Yayyyy!!!! Gmail came back for me!!! I'm so dependent on technology, I swear.

No Gmail --> Crippled

I feel crippled without my gmail. =o(

It's broken. >.<

iPhone is screwing over my coordination

Those of you that own iPhones and a Macbook will know exactly what I'm talking about. You know how you scroll on an iPhone, you press and hold and move in the direction of that you want the clicked portion to move. But on a macbook or any touchpad laptop, you move in the direction that you want your window to move. So, now I've got two coordinate systems going on, one that wants to move the content and the other that wants to move the window. >.<

iPhone -- Hold and move down --> Content moves down, so you can see stuff farther up.

Touchpad -- Scroll down --> Content moves up, so you see stuff farther down.

I've managed fine with PDF files 'cause I just scroll instead of click and drag the documents, but now everything on the iPhone like the PDF format of click-and-drag and everything else in the computing world isn't, my brain's going haywire-ish. This is going to take a while to get used to.

Photo shoot

So....today, I went on a photo shoot with a friend 'cause she needed to test out some concept photography stuff. I have no idea how this is going to turn out. Will let you guys know when she posts 'em. Who knows, if this actually turned out well, maybe I should've gone into modeling instead of med school. =oP I doubt it, back to more of that other life.

Waiting for iPhone

I'm waiting at home for the UPS person to drop by with my iPhone...

Studying sucks. -.- But you already knew that, but I'm gonna have to keep studying 'cause it's pretty much what my life is about these days, le sigh.

Strip mining in Chicago

While flying over to Midway Airport in Chicago, I saw a bunch of strip mining operations in places where it was immediately surrounded by housing areas. I thought to myself, there's gotta be a lot of crappy stuff going on down there. I mean, I hear about all sorts of environmentalists and people hating on strip mining. And when I looked around in the area, it seems like it's all low-income sort of neighborhoods with shacks, generally smaller homes similar to those that you see in the movies that have garages and long alleyways and the house front on the other side. If you've played Silent Hill, you know EXACTLY what I'm talking about. But, in any case, it seems like there were strip-mining in the middle of suburbia and that really bothers me.

So, I decided to look up why we need strip mining at all in the first place...after like using half an hour that I could've used towards studying, I went ahead and researched the topic. So...for the rest of us that don't learn about mining engineering at....I have no idea if they actually teach this sort of stuff anywhere. I think Cal has the Hearst Mining building, but that left me puzzled as to the major itself, but I digress. So strip mining is basically open surface mining in which a mining company goes in and starts cutting open the ground and digs out material for whatever it is that they need. Here's the important part, when they have to go back and refill the land, they usually use this place as a waste dump and then cover over it with some vegetation and hope that the land will take care of the rest of the problem. You can already start seeing problems after the fact.

We're already going to have this whole landscape being torn down for mining with this giant hole in the ground, but now we're going to have to just dump crap into that hole and fill it up. Of course, after a decade or two, no one will even notice that there was a ton of waste underneath it and then just build on top of it. Yay for superfund sites. Clearly, the poor will have to suffer even more after strip mining. I'm almost certain that the neighborhood that's surrounding the quarry/strip mine has grown into the region through suburban sprawl, but it's going to be the poorer and likely disenfranchised folks that'll end up living in these regions. So, it'll just spiral downhill from there for them as the property value pummel deeper into the ground, pardon the pun. So, boo to mining near major cities.

Maybe I'm just making a mountain out of a molehill (oh, I love clever use of words, you know it), but what do the rest of you think about the whole idea of strip mining?

Off to LA!

Yayyyy!!!! I'll be flying back to LA!!!! Woooooootttttt!!!

Okay, I'm going to bed.

The End of the Beginning

So, today marked the end of my second year as a medical student. Or the end of my basic science training and going to lecture halls all the time (or really, the lack of going to lecture halls 'cause I stayed at home to watch lecture videos 80-90% of the time by the end).

I kinda miss all that and seeing all of my classmates most of the time. Not that everyone went to class anyway, and even when people did, I don't think I really hung out with all that many people either. So it was like high school, but it wasn't really like high school either.

It was like high school because everyone basically knew what everyone else was doing. There were cliques, groups of people hanging out with exclusively each other, then those changed over the year, too. Think of it as an accelerated high school.

Honestly, these two years have gone by so quickly that I wish I had gone to class more often instead of sleeping in all the time. I've made some good friends and live with great housemates and gone out with college friends and their friends. People have come to visit me out in this cold and bitter weather. For all that, I'm very thankful for. Thanks everyone.

Having said all that, I worry a bit about the upcoming years of schooling. It's mostly because you hear about all of these things about backstabbing, people fighting to be the top dog in the group, pimping, getting passed over by attendings and residents. All of these horror stories of studying all the time and having no life and losing friendships, etc. But I'm also excited about all the new things I'll be learning about and all the cool things that I'll be able to see and maybe do. It won't just be looking at slides or reading books. It'll be....looking at people and reading research articles instead.... Yah, I realized that it doesn't ACTUALLY change that much, but at least I'll see things in action and participate in the whole process.

I still need to explore Ann Arbor some more. It's a nice little college town. Maybe I'll do more of that in my 4th year. At least, that's what we've all been telling ourselves. I'm hoping that I actually will. Because, honestly, I don't think I'll be coming back to this town after I get out of here. I need my big city and urban lifestyle with my group of people. So...that'll either be SUPER big city like NYC or my two favorite places in the country, LA and SF. This town's got its gems and Michigan has its beauties and charm. And how many of us from California ever actually come out to the Midwest and appreciate what it means to live in a Midwestern state? Especially a place like Michigan where we've got super huge unemployment rates, sub-freezing temperatures, 7 months of winter, apple picking, cider donuts, actual foilage, corn mazes, nice people, lack of fear of crime in small towns, and a generally different culture.

I even wanna head out to Canada once in a while to take advantage of my super close distance to the border. And, little known fact, Detroit is the only city that faces South on Canada. Now, that's gotta count for something. Yah, I need more people to visit me so I can find excuses to cross the border and show them the wonderful city of Toronto. I've likened Toronto to LA, but on a lake instead of an ocean and a million times cleaner. Hell, Toronto is probably more tolerant than LA. It would be an ideal city for me if it didn't have evil winters like Michigan. Vancouver's another city on my list, but I think I'll end up in either the Bay Area of California or the Greater Los Angeles area. That'll be another topic for another day when I decide to reminiscent about my traveling days. Now I just sound old, huh?

Until next time. =o)